That's Borax

Like all great characters, Thorax is a job-hopper, often unexplainably attaining a position for the purpose of a gag.

Organisational Structures

All,

Since we are between places at the moment I request that we backup the demo as soon as possible.

Regards,
Prunly.

PS. We need a website and mailing list for sure hoes.

Blah

When we're gigging again proper we should set up an emailing list for the purpose of advertising gigs. Offer everyone buying a demo to give us their email address and I can say it during gigs that people can give us their addresses afterwards.

Infozoia

After being kicked out of Liam's we have no place to continue recording. Any viable suggestions would be welcomed.

The death of CYBERsitter

I got the password to turn the fucker off. This pleases me greatly.

Bob Dylan

Bob makes me smile with misery. It's disgusting. We have 2 viewers?

Beetle ass

Here lies the first post to do with the band. We're playing the Boatclub this Friday the 25th of November supporting Seneca. Both our viewers must be thrilled. We managed a practise for it and we even have a setlist this time. It's not the same unless we're underprepared, the energy is lost. Probably.

Onto more important issues however...

Curses

The stupid internet in work is equiped with cybersitter meaning the blog is now blocked because I said 'cock' in the last post. F**ng cybersitter. I enjoy the post too much to delete it. F**king hoisted by my own petard.

It's allowing me to view this one though. Maybe it's because I said 'anus'.

Nope, maybe it recognises context. Maybe it's because I said 'cock and balls in his anus'.

This is senseless. There's no telling why 'Lack of Any Originality 2' is too offensive for me to view. It's the only one I can't look at.

Lack of Any Originality 2

I'm going through one of my self loathing phases. I went to Burger King for lunch and as I got there I realised I didn't hate myself enough to eat there. Instead I went to the deli in centra. I ate a hot, chicken, cheese, tomato and lettuce roll and didn't tell the twat at work.

I really like the look of the blog. It's simple but cool.

Mike has a set of cock and balls in his anus.

Lack of Any Originality

Drained of any form of creativity or originality or appropriate nouns I struggle to float in a sea of the genius of such posts that have graced this blog. I insult myself by playing the writing about having nothing to write about card.

The computer is my only short salvation from the questions of this twat at work who wonders what I might be eating for lunch.

Origin of Species

Thorax comes from the mining country of Oreland. Unfortunatley, the rich deposits of wit and charm ores the country once enjoyed in abundance have run out over time, leaving their people with little to offer but bauxite and ubiquitous coal seams.

Felled by popular demand...

I have decided to call it a day on my Badvice feature. Although it is practically impossible to ever run out of ideas I thought that the comedic impact was perhaps being lost over time. Instead I've decided to create a ridiculous cartoon that I will publish whenever I like. So you could see four in a week if I've not been too busy. Or you might see one in two weeks if I'm up to my tits.

Basically the concept is that I'll decide what this guy is and does over time. His name is Thorax, and he is some kind of outcast. I reckon he's probably got a friend/pet named Smell. His pet is almost definately inanimate. Finally, he certainly eats quite a lot of strange things.

Enjoy...

Fadvice of the Week

Indeed the time has passed. I thought about making it to a computer to post a badvice but illness had sapped all of my creativity and I didn't want to put up a token post. Also, the lack of broadband at home really displeases me.

Saturday night saw half of "local heroes" Surly's triumphant return to Dolan's. Despite being recognised by some of the crowd they still managed to enjoy two excellent sets of live music from The Republic of Loose and The Zutons. Although aware of the impact they have been making through their live shows, we had yet to see The Republic of Loose live. Indeed the entertainment value was high, between the daft mix of soul, rock, R&B and metal to the antics of their feral frontman, the crowd responding to his intimidations and taunts with salivation and vigour. If ever one needs a support act to rile up a crowd, these are the guys to do it. With the crowd aptly charged up like a rechargeable battery that had recently been charged up, it wouldn't take much to reverse the current, blowing the battery to smithereens. As The Zutons emerged, it happened. The show took on a life of its own and the crowd were loving it. The Zutons really pulled out all the stops, proving why they're still able to survive on the humble offerings of their debut album..... because they're a great live act.

Indeed the mix of Guinness and good times made it a night not to forget, but to remember.

Badvice of the Week

My level of static emmissions has dropped again. I must be eating more. Although I had one huge shock which I attribute directly to touching that bloody door handle with a freshly taken off, and thus hair-charged cardigan.

Moving onto more pressing issues however...

Badvice #6.0
Sear your flesh with aluminium parts that have been heated to 160C

Curb your Electrocution

One may recall my problems with electricity in the past. I took the first step when I admitted I had a problem. Then it was time for action. I identified problematic items and areas in the factory and took care to avoid interacting with them unnecessarily. I avoided touching the printing desk and the toilet lightswitch housing for example. I kept my hands away from radiators too. However, touching the door handle of a colleague's office could not be simply cut from my item interaction diet. It was a staple. So I invented a method of brushing my palm along the metal doorframe to earth myself before touching the handle. It worked superbly. I thought my days of static discharge were over, much to my delight.

Then this morning I hit rock bottom. When you become secure in your new self you sometimes forget that you once had a problem. I was shocked by my own PC. Now I don't know who I am anymore. Even the door handle has given me a few mild shocks already today. My t-shirt is filthy from all the dirt attracted by the mild electrical field I'm emmiting. Toast crumbs clung for dear life to my polystyrene cup of tea at breakfast.

I'm a wreck. Updates to follow.

Badvice of the Week

Badvice #5.0
Carry volatile explosives in your knees